He replaces the phone on its base and rubs his temples. He's never had to deal with this before. Sadness courses through his veins, his throat constricts, and that tension in his jaw develops. (the one he associates with pain, tears, and heartache)

They tell her she has cancer. That word feels like a knife, subtly stabbing at his heart, reminding him of all the times that word has ended in pain, tears, and heartache.

She says it feels like she is telling the story about a dear friend. . . in a sense, that statement bares truth as she is one of his dearest and most faithful friends. His only response is concern, hers too, but not for herself. She is used to bearing the burdens of others, such that even in times as these, she is concerned for her listeners' pain - ignoring her own.

Is this what it felt like, Lord God? To watch the love and pride of your life bear such burdens and suffer such pain? You watched from afar, as he must, to see your son, his savior, bear the cross. He does that now, as he watches your servant, his mother bear her cross.

The fiercest pain is having no tears to drown this heartache.